‘Is this a dream or reality?’ I am sure some of you, if not all, may have asked themselves the same question in an intricate day-dreaming state of mind.
I am standing right now beside these tall ancient buildings, asking myself the same question. The buildings are dark brown with just the right amount of golden shade that adds to their glory. Its not easy to look towards the top without straining you neck, but it is worth it. Doing that makes you feel small, almost too tiny to meet eyes with your own conscience.
I am confused. I can’t decide whether to reflect myself in the magic of these buildings that are connected to each other but feel so apart, that they seem lonely. Or to look at people, walking hand in hand, in pairs and in groups, with smiles on their faces talking to each other, enjoying each other’s company better than the silence of these buildings. And listen to the stories being told by their eyes casting sorrowful shadows that are mismatched to the big upward curve of their lips.
At places between the main road with tall buildings, there are narrow streets that emerge out of nowhere. Strolling on these streets is a totally different experience. I feel like I am inside a historical Hollywood movie, in which wars are fought and traditions are preserved. The walking paths here are made of bricks and carry small vintage cafes, pubs and restaurants that give out a strange homely feeling. Everything is perfect, the architecture, the colors and the classical smell. I walk closer to the wall along one of a vintage cafe with old furniture, some torn up books and a piano in it’s window and touch it. And wonder if it is just me, ……or anyone else can also hear sobs?
Well, may be it is just me. I am a traveler not a tourist, so I tend to feel things no one else can. I am not even sure if those things are real or is it just my own reflection that I see in places that own footsteps of people from thousands of years ago.
I pause for a second and take a deep long breath, trying to take in the air that smells of the past. Standing there right beside my eyes; Centuries pass, faces walking along these paths change, some colors fade and some are brightened, spellings on the name boards at the front of little shops are shuffled to form other words and melancholy… it lingers in the air of these streets. And Within a blink of my eye, it all comes back to the present. Its just a street, a normal street that quite conveniently takes you to your destination. Right. But where would it take you if you don’t have any destination at all?
After wandering around for the whole day it is time to go back. But the strange thing? My heart. It used to be active, mostly to cry and be sad but it was active. Active is being alive, no? And right now, after seeing so much, I feel like I have seen nothing. Do I feel sad now? I do, yes. Do I cry and ask for help? No I don’t. Because there is no one. Absolutely no one. Just the silence and empty heart beats. I laugh now, I tell jokes. I am funny. Because, I guess I have no other option. Not being funny asks for someone to listen to the reason of not being funny and there is no one. So hey there lifeless buildings and silent streets, You are about to be discovered some more by a traveler who is not alive anymore.
White Shadows 
Hi Lala.
Thinking of you again so I thought I’d drop a line. I think you’d be surprised if you knew how often I think of you. Dunno why I’m so stuck on someone I’ll never meet who is “no more important than a grain of sand”.
Anyway, if my best wishes can effect reality then you must be having a pretty good time. Or is that just best wishful thinking?
Hi Cabrogal.
I don’t think it’s strange that you think of me, sometimes some people leave a permanent mark on a corner of our mind, whether them being very great or just a grain of sand.
I am not surprised. That happens to me too. May be we both have got the wrong faulty minds 🙂
And well, I am sorry to break it to you that your best wishes didn’t work for me, but I am good at keeping up appearances you know so all is good 🙂 How is life treating you? any new adventures on your plate?
Well, it’s all an adventure, isn’t it?
But my life’s pretty routine these days. One adventure follows the other in monotonous regularity. I guess if I was susceptible to boredom it’d be pretty tedious, but no two things are really the same. Boredom is a failure of perception.
I miss traveling though. I often dream about the friends I made on the road and wake up wishing I was with them. Mind you, I have the same sort of dreams about my old school friends and I sure don’t miss school.
I think maybe you’re right about tourists vs travelers, but where does that leave the large group of people who don’t seem to be ticking a list but when they get to places they stay pretty much in a manufactured bubble of their own culture and comfort? Holidaymakers? I think there’s lots of people who don’t feel they can be free within their own community. They need to leave it to feed their mind and soul. Of course some of them are looking for a chance to feed it with the sort of thing they’d be ashamed to do at home.
Great to hear from you again Lala.
I’m not someone to ask about photography but I think I know a little about writing and yours is developing beautifully.
But what’s the difference between a traveler and a tourist?
Over eight years hauling a backpack around Asia and I never worked that one out. Unless travelers means ‘us’ and tourists means ‘them’. I feel most like a tourist in the country of my birth.
Have you been back to Faisalabad since you emigrated?
Hey Cabrogal, It is great to hear from you ! Thank you for reading and liking what you read 🙂
Well I myself is not sure about the precise difference yet but in my opinion, may be traveler is the one who visits places in search of finding something new to feed his mind and soul and tourists are the ones who visit the same places in order to add a name in their list of places they have visited 🙂 Sounds stupid but that’s what i think.
And yeah I have been to Pakistan twice since I moved. Though both times in Summer and you know how hot it is there in Summer so couldn’t enjoy much.
Hope you are doing well.
Lala!
First of all omg god that last line! I’m taking a screenshot of it and writing it in my journal with your name at the bottom for credit.
I swear it was so beautiful.
And hey this post felt so beautiful to me, cause for the first time I felt someone can relate to what I go through when I see new places.. I literally think of all the things which might have happened there.. how many people might have lived there and died there and cried there… maybe someone had their most beautiful life experience in that place while another might have had their most devastating period there..
And Lala it felt really really good to finally see your name in my reader.
I swear I felt a jolt the moment I read your name and I was like omg omg omg I have to read this! Lala wrote something after so long ❤️
I hope you’ve been well, you beautiful soul.. 🌷
Aww Hiba,first of all LOVE YOU ! Your comment just made my day haha never knew someone would be that excited to read me 😀 Thank you so, so much for liking my writing and reading it on the first place. And you quoted my words, WOW That’s like really big 🙂 So happy and so thankful to you, you are amazing ! Love you always xx
I love you too ❤❤
SMiLes.. Lala Rukh.. First
oF all pleasantly surprised to
see you online.. i had a visitor
at my Blog recently who very much
reminded me of you in so many ways..
And here
you are
another
memory
from the
past comes
livinG now aS
always real friends
Seem to Do.. Shelters..
Shadows of the Divine.. now
one leads to the other it seems
most to me.. to clothe a soul in protection
from the rain the snow the wind and air of drOught..
but what
about the
heaRt the
SpiRit and A
SoUL oF miNd
and BoDy BaLancE
that is real when seT now
FReER unlocked from keys
of shelter.. that can and will also
shutdown soul to Shadows of Divine..
So..
you’ve
identified
the problem
noW all it takes
is path to esCaPe..
you’re SeeKinG noW all
you need be do is FiNd..
and practice
wings
of
Free
in spiral
Bird SonG
no longer sheltered.. from Tree..:)
Hey there ! Thank you for welcoming me again as you always do with smiles 🙂 You are right, I am seeking now.. all that’s left is to find. Thanks for always being here 🙂 Love xx
WeLL.. ‘this’ is an encouraging record..
two months in a row i will not have
to stop by on the 6th as promised
as Lala Rukh comes back
to her Blog site
with some
words..
sMiLes.. mY
friend you helped
encourage me at a time
i needed encouragement the
most.. you write Well and i FeeL
and Sense it hELps your soUL
And the greaTesT LesSoN
for Me in Life is to
Evolve the
soUL
as the
soUL Grows
With ArT so much
more in MoVinG
ConNecTinG
And all
Creation
Activity Works
of Art it is the practice
oF soUL thAT counts mY
FriEnd.. Never ever GiVinG uP
whether or not someone else and
even God wHo/tHaT may seem to Go Mute is
not answering on the other end and staRt oF Line..
anyway.. you have a Writing Fan for Life as Give and Share
always
leads
to Love
sometimes it
takes years and
perhaps lifetimes
and perhaps eternity
Now as i’ve already visited
in a long Cold Hell of 66 months
but never the less empty shells of words
can become Love fELt too.. when words FeeL God More..
as
Love..:)