Just Sharing A Thought…

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You know the thing that suffocates you till you can’t breathe anymore? That’s a wish. And then that dark shadow that occupies your mind and shuts off the light of your eyes just before making you unconscious? That’s despair. And then a sudden air that forces it’s way up your nose and mouth and pumps your heart very hard and makes you feel alive again? That’s hope.

It is raining outside. Whenever it rains, my heart talks nonsense just like that.

I don’t hate rains like other people do here (By here I mean, here, In the city where I live now. where weather is cold almost throughout the year).

Rain is still like a mystery to me. I haven’t experienced getting wet in it with hands stretched in the air and face towards the sky. I don’t know what it feels like to sit on the stairs in front of my home with a mug of coffee in hands and staring at the rain drops pouring on the ground beside me. I don’t know the warmth of hugging someone special while standing in the rain showers. I’d also like to scream and laugh out loud in the streets though there might be a risk of being caught in this.

All I have seen of rain is from my window glass, while reading a book or staring outside purposelessly. Sad, Quiet.I want to know it more but I am scared. I am scared that if I’d know and experience everything about rain that’s mystery to me now, what will I do then? There would be nothing left to wonder about. It will all be over.

Then, I’ll start hating it like others.

I know that’s absurd. I am being strangely honest. I am so scared of taking one step further and I don’t know when this habit took control of me. I can just think and think for hours of getting out of my comfort zone but I have no courage to step out practically. I am not brave enough.

May be I am still circling around into the darkness of despair or may be, I am breathing that fresh air of hope but I haven’t realized it’s there.

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19 thoughts on “Just Sharing A Thought…

  1. i remember i used to enjoy rain when i was a kid, dark clouds filling up the sky in middle of a sunny day and i felt happiness, how the colors changed in the sky, the roaring clouds, the scent of sand after the rain it used to feel so good… but as i grew older those feeling associated with rain faded away as years added up in my life, to a point that i felt nothing when it came, it even brought gloom with it sometimes since it all depends on the weather inside. But like a loyal companion rain never leaves you (unless you actually live in a desert) its always there… all i think we need is someone to share it with (whether its hope or a person) to bring the joy back, to remind us of its presence.

  2. Heyyyyyyy Lala. I am just trying to get caught up now on reading blogs. As you know, I have been away. I always like reading yours.
    I, for one, grew up in Vancouver, BC – Canada. It is very, very, very rainy there. I am probably just like your neighbors in England that don’t like it. However, after living in Brazil for over a decade, I have grown to appreciate small bouts of it. But all in all, I’m a sun girl, all the way. It does wonders for me. It releases the ever so needed serotonin in my brain that I desperately need. I am very affected by climate and weather. Actually, the best I have ever been emotionally was when I lived in India for a few months. It was sunny every single day.
    I hope you’re doing well back at your home now. I hope your visit was wonderful.
    Love and blessings.
    🙂 ❤

  3. What a brilliant description! Love your writing, Lala.
    Despair comes flitting in my life to be banished by hope as soon as it touches my heart. Being an eternal optimist means that hope is on the lookout for banishing any traces of despair which manage to get through.
    I love rain. I have played and danced in the rain, and enjoyed every drop of it. Since, I was a child in the rain then, I have even laughed, and screamed in the rain without anyone thinking I was crazy. Those days of childhood! I wish I could do all that again.

  4. Lala, I am at loss of words here, because you said there everything I’ve ever wanted to explain about rain, how I see it. I love it, for everything that it is; the sad, the melancholic, the mysterious, the quiet, the calmness…Everything. Rain has this aura, this effect, Gosh I can’t explain, see? But YOU! You took my breathe away with every word, the fascination, the fear, the confusion in your thoughts, so beautifully penned. WOW! ❤

  5. Well there’s one beautiful thing I know about rain. Especially drizzle. Calm rain is mercy from God and you can have all your prayers answered during rain just as the best time for du’aa is in sujood or during a journey.
    And hence I don’t hate rain. I’ve played a lot in rain as a child. I don’t enjoy it much anymore. Or I guess I’m just a little more insecure now that I’ve grown up. But I like the happy feeling it brings with the knowledge of how I can now make lots of du’aa. Plus rain is quite rare in Kuwait. So you’ve gotta cherish it. 😊

  6. Rain is an extraordinary thing. Even after you go and explore it, stretch your palms out and face the sky, it’s like there’s still more to it. Like when it rains again there will be more to that rain, another experience hidden, waiting for us to take the step and discover its beauty.

  7. Rain is God’s greaTest GiFt
    to human as iT bRinGs
    purifying water to sustain LiFE…
    Once.. there is a human that wanders arid
    lands.. this human Loves rain as much
    as life itself.. as inDeeD Rain is Life
    as Life iS for
    human being.. then and NOw..
    this human wishes more than
    anything.. to have a rain
    that reins forevermore
    as reign of KinG
    of VeinS
    Love
    Human
    groWinG
    noWmore..
    so yes.. in
    metaphor
    this human
    eventuAlly
    wanders
    North and
    finds the place
    where you live now..
    in a land.. a new world
    of cold and endless rain
    that sadly drOwns
    thirst of human
    heArt..
    extinguishing
    FiRe of human
    SpiRit that must
    move invisibly
    to capture
    prey
    and
    escape predator
    on butterfly dance
    feat of human being..
    and to connect to other
    human beings in these
    arid lands of little.. is to
    survive.. to LiVE spiRit
    expresSinG human
    emotiON emoting
    human Force of
    God’s Love
    gifTing gRAce
    alWays
    iNbalanCinG
    SoUl of human beInG
    mind and body REAL
    ALL innate.. instinctual
    intuitive.. from ALL oriGiN
    InFiniTy aLL n0w as
    human evolves
    through
    GOD
    ‘s
    grace sTilL NOW..
    MoVinG.. ConnecTinG
    CreaTinG.. reflecTinG
    GOD’s UniVersAL
    SoUl of
    BEINGAlWAYS
    NOW.. as we WiLL
    BE too.. if we
    generate
    Force
    of GOD..
    the spark
    the flAMe
    inside
    not yet
    put out
    by instant gratification
    of new human reign
    of reins of
    all we can
    eat
    rain..
    The real devil is fear..
    The real sin is succumbing
    to instant gratification
    with no longer
    the challenge
    of Life that GOD
    bRinGs to uS
    as MoVinG
    ConnecTinG
    CreaTinG
    adaptTinG
    chanGinG
    reflecTioNs
    ForCe
    ChanGe
    alWays
    aLLthaTis
    GOD..
    Rain has more than
    rainbow colors for those
    who see and feel ALL
    MORE COLORS OF
    GOD’S eYes BeInG
    and when we are stifLED
    or abuse(D) those colors
    without challenge
    adaptations
    and change
    we lose GoD’s
    gift of grace to us
    as always
    NOW..
    and those who look forward
    or past.. will never
    ever
    LiVE
    aGaiN..
    SMiLEs.. anyway.. nice to
    see you on the 5th as i am
    thinKinG of what to write
    you without a poetic
    prompt for you..6th..
    and i Love to
    be inspiRed
    by otHeRs
    more than
    a weak attempt
    to inspire them without
    a connection from them..
    as always for me Love is
    Uncondtional without any
    stRinGs attaChinG no
    requirements from
    me but to
    breathe
    my friend..
    but i will tale you this..
    as a 234 LB man who
    can leg press half a ton
    now 25 times straight
    forward on a parallel
    leg press machine
    with arms raised in
    air.. dance walking
    a martial arts style
    of ballet everywhere i go
    now for 4200 miles or so
    since i meet you at the end
    of July when i gain greatgift
    of Phoenix from God that YOU
    help spark in me.. i am fearless
    but yet.. my heart.. spirit.. and soul..
    is as or more sensitive than it has ever
    been before as a Human Empath Angel
    houSinG as this body of steel.. AlL tHis Love i
    give to you and expect absolutely nothing in
    return.. and although out of concern for you..
    when i attempt to reach out to you..
    as i always do.. i am very happy
    to get that notification on
    my iPhone that you
    accept my
    facebook
    friend
    request.. from months..
    as sure reciprocation now
    feels good too.. to all we
    human beings.. i don’t
    say anything but a like
    on one of your posts
    that says it all
    that Love
    is a spirit
    with no time..
    distance or space..
    that never ends when
    real with yes.. no sorrows
    regrets.. or shame
    no matter what
    happens or what
    the other person does..
    in life.. but i will
    say this too..
    as a human being
    for whatever reason
    that Lala Rukh face
    is erased from my
    friendship face
    list either
    intentional
    or not intentional
    that hurt my feelings
    in a little dArk way
    but yet it inspires
    me more..
    as that my
    friend is the
    PRACTICE OF
    THE REAL UNCONDITIONAL
    TOUGH AND PASSIONATE
    LOVE OF ALLAH
    ALWAYS
    RESTORieD
    IN US.. THAT NEVER
    GIVES UP then or NOW
    AND IS A PERFECT
    STORM OF LOVE
    THAT NEVER
    REIGNS DEAD
    WITH REINS OF
    RAIN THAT
    ARE ALWAYS
    CHERISHED
    AND
    NEVER
    EVER
    TAKEN
    FOR GRANTED
    by me at least my
    friend.. To be the Truth
    and Light as guided by
    GOD is a greaTesT
    challenge and
    adaptation
    from GOD
    for change..
    but it is a challenge
    and my real
    version
    of Ramadan
    that rains
    forever
    now
    my friend..
    with this..
    Love,
    Fred…
    And sure..
    i just share
    a stream
    of consciousness
    thought too that comes
    from the ocean of human
    cosmic consciousness
    also known as
    Holy Spirit..
    and so many
    other metaphors
    across all cultures
    and religions always
    now.. when two humans
    connect in whatever way
    where GOD comes into
    the room too..
    to have
    GOD’s
    say
    so
    as well.
    but yah.. sure
    human language
    is so dam limited
    that we will never
    speak the
    full language
    of God and
    that my friend
    is the most beautiful
    reality of all.. the mystery
    and magic of GOD that will
    always keep us on our toes
    and alive.. for those of us
    who hear
    the cALL..
    answer
    and never
    ever give IT UP..
    as GOD’s
    GreaTesT
    GiftINfinite
    potenTiaL reflecTinG
    in Human GOD’s
    eYes and eaRS
    of
    N0W..
    LOVE..
    my friend..
    Lala Rukh..:)

  8. I love this. So beautiful and sad. Maybe you should try to go out in the rain and explore it. You might learn something new, and discover something that went unseen before…like the smell of earth after rain…

  9. This is such an amazing post! I really love your blog so much and in turn cannot stop reading all of your posts. Please don’t ever stop writing them because I love your posts too much!

  10. please check out my blog-‘trust …is that you?’ as i admire you and would love if you commented ,liked and followed it as i obviously have done as this post truly is beautiful.

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