Five Steps To Establish A New Planet Lazily

Okay so today’s daily prompt has just given me fits of giggles. I haven’t seen this type of insanely ridiculous topic ever in daily prompt. I guess the author of daily prompt may be scared of The walking dead Apocalypse or he/she is missing Terra Nova these days. Either ways, the idea of designing another planet seems funny. I would like to run my imagination wild anyway. Did I mention he/she called it Inter-planet Janet ? 😀

Step 1: Assigning a name:

Earth Burger would be nice, eh ?

The planet we live on is Earth. We have Mars, Jupiter and Saturn etc as our neighbors. I mean don’t all of these names sound boring to you ? The name of a planet should be of some delicious food like dark chocolate fudge or cheese cake or something like chicken chili or Biryani or large chicken pizza with some extra cheese…hhmmmm !!… ( Sorry, that was my belly ). Just imagine every time you call the name of your planet, your mouth will be filled with water. Instead of saying “I swear to Mother Earth” you’ll say “I swear to Mother Chocolate fudge” and all your worries except of food will disappear. Or if you are not a food junkie like me, why not call it ‘The Lazy Earth’ ? I know there is a lazy person hidden inside each one of you. It is time to pay tribute to him.

Step 2: Designing Weather And Seasons:

Make the sun rise with your thumb !

While living on Earth and experiencing its technological developments, I got into the habit of doing things by just clicking a button. A touch on a touch screen works well too. So I would like to give every inhabitant of my planet a device with lots and lots of buttons, each button for a different season and climate. They will have the sun rise and sun fall whenever they want. They will have rain and a romantic cloudy windy weather in one click. Mummies of my planet won’t have to worry about waking their children up with the sun rise even on Sundays and couples won’t have to worry about having a date in romantic weather. And lazy people like me will keep turning on the night mode and sleeping whole day. Being lazy is a ‘THING’ don’t you know ?

Step 3: Providing Some Unique Necessities:

Water,air and food being the necessities of life is out dated. Earth is full of sharp wise people who love irritating innocent lazy people like me. My planet would be a lovely place for the lazy ones. I have designed some equipment in my mind that would be a part of every home on my planet. A short list of which includes:

1-  Automatic Bed Maker:

See the magic !

Yes ! Don’t laugh. I hate it when every morning my mom instead of asking me to sleep more , shouts at me for not making my bed. I have to stop this violence. My beloved lazy people have to stand beside the bed and say the magic spell “O bed, Make yourself ! ” and BOOM……!!

2-The Lazy Mug:

Who wants coffee ?

This mug stirs the coffee automatically so you don’t need to move your hands anymore to stir it with a spoon. Now you can enjoy bed tea in winters without worrying about your laziness.

3- The automatic book reading chair:

Excited ?

Yes you have guessed it right. This chair do wonders. It holds your book , automatically turns its pages for you and move the book in whatever direction you want. I have added an additional function in it. It can also read for you in its own voice if you are not in a mood to use your mind. Yeah you have to still move your eye balls for watching pictures.Don’t worry, I will invent something to avoid it soon !

4- Automatic Pancake Maker:

I have a crush on food since childhood so…

This machine will make your mornings easier specially if you have to make breakfast for the whole family. Forget about making pancakes in pans…nah! Use this machine. It can save your several precious seconds.

5- The sock buddy:

Best buddy in winters

Hate doing hard work for pulling up socks in winters? Here’s the solution. The best buddy in winters. Happy winters.

Step 4: Choice of Inhabitants:

 

When Mr. Bean meets Justin Bieber !

Any creature like Mr.bean or Justin Bieber will be accepted here. Every person should have one weird quality and they will be registered through that quality. I don’t need violence so leave your guns at home. Cooks and chefs who can make delicious food for me are warmly welcomed. All the fashion Divas and hot movie heroes should come. I love Keanu Reeves so he will have a special guest treatment here. People who think they are ‘something’ are restricted. Teachers are restricted too as they have tortured our innocent civilization so much. Robots are welcomed. Dudes with fake 6 packs and girls with plastic surgeries of everything have a special place here. Hot white dudes with blue eyes and foreign accent should pack their bags already. Aliens from Mars are invited to pay visits frequently. Welcome home buddies !

Step 5: Executing The Above Mentioned Plans:

Dozing Off…..

Eww Hard work ? And this soft bed….I should better sleep.